Monday, November 9, 2009

Time to file for divorce. I'm sure there's an app for that...

My wife and I have been married for almost 5 years now, and have been together for almost 10. I suppose that's not a bad run. As they say, all good things come to an end. However, I never thought it'd end like this.

The other day my wife bought something new - something you use by holding close to your body. The thing would even vibrate if you wanted it to. It was something she'd been wanting for a while, and like a fool, I let her get one.

I'm cursing myself now even as I write this. I should have seen it coming. I mean, the day she purchased her new toy she ended up spending the whole day with it. She even went to bed early to play with it.

And now, most nights when I go to bed, this is what I'm confronted with:

And on my pillow no less! I guess I'm no longer needed. I've been replaced - by an iHusband. And she never stops touching the damn thing either. But you know what? It doesn't matter. It's just a fad. It'll pass - I'm sure of it. I'm a patient man. A couple of years and everything will be back to normal.

Ah well, in the interim there's always my Wife 360...


Helen said...

Oh my gosh my hand looks huge! It kind of freaks me out sometimes to realise how tall I am... and yes - I am replying to this using my new toy!

Don't worry honey - I've only got a two-year contract for the phone - you're stuck with me for life!

Love you too :)

SilverNeurotic said...

The last guy I dated had one of them, and yeah, I often felt like he paid more attention to that than me. Though, it wasn't the reason we stopped seeing each other.

Meg said...


Thanks for following my blog!

Tomurai said...

Things are better now. She lets me use it every now and again in between reminding me via the internet that I'm stuck with her for life.

Likewise, thank YOU for following my blog :)
And if I may say, you've got one of the classiest looking blogs I've ever seen!

Courtney said...

No need for divorce, I'm sure there is an app for marriage counseling. :D

Thanks for the follow!